In amongst the decision-making about shedding activities, roles and attitudes that no longer work, it was something of a surprise to discover that what I most urgently need to shed was failing to make time to do things that energize and excite me. In my over-achieving mind taking time out for fun is time ‘wasted’. I hadn’t consciously realized that in doing this, although I initially got a great deal more work done, I was now stalling and losing impetus.
So now I have to go back to remembering what I like to do to get energized. It is ironic that my pleasure in journal making and writing were the basis of my progress through midlife, however once I started to research them and make my process more academic, I lost touch with those very things I was so inspired to do! I realized that I hadn’t made a book or journal in months – I simply plan them out mentally and then move on, which isn’t a very satisfying process. It is probably no surprise either that this thought came to me as I was knitting!
It also came back to me that I love to travel, but haven’t been anywhere new or different this year. Given that I get lots of new ideas from things I notice while I am traveling, once again I have limited my opportunities for mental stimulation by staying close to home. Granted that in this economy grand scale travel isn’t in my budget, but within a few hours of driving I can be in several different states, so really have no excuse not to find something interesting that is happening and go and do it.
In this general state of what have I stopped doing that I enjoy, I realized that I hadn’t taken any classes recently – except for an html and css class that were brief refresher sessions. Flipping through an online catalog I saw that there are so many things I could learn – from Reiki to ballroom dancing – that I currently know very little about. It is so much easier to justify classes that I can count as being useful to my graphic design work than those simply for the pleasure of learning.
So now I have to give my self permission to go and play again, and make sure that I practice what I preach. Having thought about what you need to get rid of to be true to who you are, what do you need to bring back into your life?
